© 2017 Courtney Parks Coaching

  • Courtney Parks, MA, CPCC

How To Use Jealousy to Fuel Your Own Success


It’s natural to compare ourselves to others, right?

These days we spend so much time looking around and what everyone else is doing, it’s easy to get lost and feel like we don’t measure up.

Comparison can be a slippery slope professionally, especially when it comes to numbers. When we compare our income, department size, customer base or followers, there will always be someone (usually many people) that will beat us at that game. Even if we don’t know the numbers, we can still feel “less than” when someone else looks bigger and better than us.

So how do we get out of the negative comparison trap and use others to serve us rather than bring us down?

Like most things, it starts with awareness.

Notice your feelings

Whether you’re watching, following or interacting with someone in your business or career, pay attention to your own reaction. Does this person or what they represent inspire you? Do they make you frustrated or annoyed? Are you drawn in and want to connect more or are you uncomfortable and find yourself closing up?

Your feelings are powerful indicators of what’s going on beneath the surface. So notice (don’t judge) and act accordingly.

Just say no to feeling bad

If comparing yourself to someone makes you feel small, don’t include them in your experience. While there are times we have strong reactions to people that help us stretch, they really only help when they spark something good.

Our fears and doubts are like hungry children who want to be fed - and feeling bad does nothing to support our soul or our success. So disconnect, unfollow or create space with those who stir up consistent negative feelings…and do your best to surround yourself with support, especially when your confidence is low.

Bringing out the best in you

Comparison that brings positive growth is my favorite. There are so many people who thrill me when I watch, listen or learn from them – their fire sparks mine, they open me up and they help me do what’s in my heart. I’ve followed and worked with mentors who’ve taught me, inspired me and given me the courage to be who I am. I’ve also disconnected on purpose to dig deep into my intuition and stay focused on the projects and process that feel right for me.

So once you’ve gotten a taste of what’s out there, give yourself room to tap into your own genius and let that shine through in your work. The world wants the gifts that only you can give and no one can be - or will ever be - a better version of you.

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